As I long for my blog to be a spiritual respite for my friends far and near, I have asked one of the greatest men I know to share a moment of his life. Enjoy some words from my father, Reverend J. Bryan Jones.
Authenticity of Emotion
Our embarrassments tend to stick in our mind and make an indelible impression. It may be a social faux pas, an inappropriate or uninformed communication, or simply being misunderstood by those around us.
The later was my experience in the company of a great number of friends and ministry colleagues. And not just once but twice…. two days in a row. The occasion was a PALCON (Pastor’s Leadership Conference) on the campus of SNU, 1980-ish. Pastors from across the region had gathered for inspiration, instruction and just a little R & R. The first plenary gathering was to feature a very favorite speaker of mine, Reuben Welch. He is the most quotable, and consequently the most memorable, of any speaker I have ever had the privilege of hearing …e.g. “Sometimes you have to give to God your inability to give yourself to God.” And I was not about to miss a word. I took my seat in Herrick Auditorium middle row, second pew, isle seat.
The special music for the service was provided by a popular quartet who could raise the roof with their renditions of old gospel favorites. The “Amens”, waving of hands and vocal expressions of praise soon spilled into the isles and escalated into a concert of mixed shouts and holy hugs that everyone seemed to be enjoying but me. With the third or fourth repeating of the refrain to “The King is Coming” the expressions of emotion were unrestrained. The good ole term was “God came down and filled everyone with His Spirit.”
I didn’t feel a thing! Friends and acquaintances came by and slapped me on the back as if encouraging me to get in the game. However, my temperamental propensities would not allow me to engage in something that wasn’t me. I just sat there, expressionless like a lump on a log. So far as I was concerned, it was an emotional orgy and I was ready for it to be over. It was probably my imagination thinking I was getting glances of suspicion that maybe I had backslidden or lost the victory. My embarrassment soon turned into fear that they would gather around me with the laying on of hands, praying that my cold, cold heart would turn to God.
Well…..the emotions finally subsided, the services continued and at the conclusion I made a quick exit determined to not get caught like that again. The next service, I slipped into a pew near the back and sat alone. However, a loving God was about to give this humble servant a dose of something real. In place of the raucous quartet, Professor Ray Moore took the mic and, with piano accompaniment only, sang the beautiful old hymn, “My Faith Has Found a Resting Place.” My spirit was touched, my emotions erupted. Tears flowed freely and my body shook in response to the waves of joy that filled my breast. It was all I could do to keep from disrupting the quiet moment with my shouts of praise.
By now, you are wondering about the second embarrassment. Once again it may have been my overactive imagination but I was sure I was receiving furtive glances that spoke questions of why this guy sitting all alone was losing it. No one else seemed to be having an emotional upheaval but me.
Once again I made my quick and silent exit not wanting to make eye or voice contact with anyone. All these years later, I am sure no one remembers the occasion but me, but the embarrassing spectacle I may have been in the eyes of my brothers in ministry has been transformed into a sweet memory of a special witness of the Spirit that came like a flood.
I am not very vocal in my emotional expressions. Pretty quiet, really, and I like it that way. But the joy of salvation wells up and the assurance of salvation is my constant experience. The mantra of my life is solidly expressed in these words:
My faith has found a resting place, not in device or creed
I trust the ever-living One, His wounds for me shall plead.
Enough for me that Jesus saves – this ends my fear and doubt
A sinful soul I come to Him – He’ll never cast me out.
My heart is leaning on the Word, the written Word of God.
Salvation by my Savior’s name, salvation through His blood.
I need no other argument, I need no other plea.
It is enough that Jesus died, and that He did for me.
Lidie Edmunds ca. 1891
Feeling the joy,
Bryan Jones
This was really special from Uncle Bryan. Tell him thanks for me 🙂
I absolutely will. We are a family blessed.